I'm not in the right headspace for a relationship: what to text back

When someone leads with the headspace line, read it as a boundary, not a rejection. She's telling you the current size of the thing she can handle. That usually means she's been through something, or is in the middle of something, that takes most of her energy. Plenty of people say this because they actually enjoy your company and feel guilty about the mismatch, so the message can carry warmth alongside the no.

The useful question isn't whether she means it, because she probably does. The useful question is whether she still wants to see you in a form that fits her current capacity. Her next message, and how she handles plans, will tell you far more than the wording of this one. Watch whether she keeps the conversation going, suggests things herself, or starts to hedge and disappear.

Three kinds of reply tend to work here. The first is a plain acknowledgement, short and warm, that takes the statement at face value and asks nothing back. Its job is to show you're fine with it. You can tell a draft is this kind because it doesn't ask about the reason. It leaves out any attempt to negotiate.

The second is a reply that keeps things light and says so, naming the kind of contact you're happy with. Its job is to remove any ambiguity about what you're offering. It shouldn't promise a future or hint that you're waiting for her to change her mind. The third is a reply that lets the subject drop and moves to something unrelated you both can talk about, like a shared joke or a question about her week. Its job is to show her the conversation is still easy. Leave out any reference back to what she just said, so she doesn't have to keep defending the point.

Respond within a few hours if you can, but not in the middle of a late night or while you're still stung. A rushed reply tends to carry a little edge. Once you've sent something warm and clear, give it a day or two before you say anything else, unless she's asked you a direct question.

If she answers warmly and keeps talking, you can make a light plan at a pace that suits her. If she doesn't reply, don't follow up with a second message on the same topic. One more light message after a week, on something unrelated and easy to answer, is fine. After that, stop. If she turns the offer down again or the contact fizzles, let it go and be the person who was gracious about it. That reputation travels, and sometimes it brings people back when their own situation changes.