What to text when she says finals have her swamped

When someone says finals have them swamped, the useful information is in how long she expects to be busy, not in the wording of the excuse. Most exam periods run one to three weeks. If she told you the end date, or said she'd be free after a specific exam, that date is the real signal. Plan around it.

What you're reading for is whether she's still interested in talking with you at all. Someone who's really stretched will still send a short reply now and then, even if it's a single emoji or a thumbs up, and will pick the thread back up when they surface. If she goes completely silent for the whole stretch and doesn't come back afterward, that tells you the interest was lower than you thought.

A good message in this window makes it easy for her to respond later without owing you anything right now. That means one message, no question that demands a long answer, and no request to plan something she can't commit to. You can acknowledge the stress, wish her luck, and leave the door open with a light line that doesn't require a reply.

You also want to avoid signaling that you're sitting by the phone. Keep your own life moving so your message reads as one thing among many. If she sees you as steady and busy yourself, she's more likely to reply warmly when she has time.

Timing does a lot of work here. A message that arrives late at night during exams can read as needy or as a sign you're hovering. Send your well wishes during the day, ideally around a point when she'd plausibly be taking a break, like the morning of an exam or the evening after one. A single message is enough. Waiting a day or two before checking back is usually right.

If you send something and get no reply for several days, don't escalate. Let the silence be the answer for now. Once her exams are finished, a light, low pressure message like asking how the last one went gives her an easy way back in. If that also goes unanswered, stop initiating for a while and let her choose the next move.