What to say when she says she'll decide if you're worth her time

The phrase itself tells you a lot. "I'll decide" means she is in the judge's seat and wants you to know it. The lol or the emoji usually means she is half joking, which gives you room to play along without treating it as a verdict. Look at what came right before it. If you were sharing something about your week and she answered with the test, she may be deflecting intimacy. If you had just made a plan and she responded with the test, she may be checking whether you're going to be easy to deal with.

In both cases she is not asking for proof. She is watching how you react to being evaluated. A person who is secure can treat the challenge as part of the fun. A person who is anxious will either over-deliver or disappear. Pick up on which one you're tempted to be, because that's the part of the reply that will actually land.

The first move is to take the test seriously enough to acknowledge it, but not seriously enough to defend yourself. Something that says you're fine with being judged and have no intention of begging is enough. Then, in the same message or the next, give her a specific, low-stakes thing to respond to. A question about her week, a small observation about what she said, or a plan that's easy to say yes or no to. The specificity is what turns the test back into a conversation. Vague confidence doesn't do it.

Keep your own footing too. You're allowed to have a view on whether she's worth your time. Letting her know you're also making a call, lightly, shifts the frame from being evaluated to two people sizing each other up. That balance is what makes the exchange feel like a date rather than an audition.

The timing of your reply sends its own message. If she's testing, a reply that arrives within the same few minutes can read as eager, and a reply that comes the next afternoon can read as indifferent. Aim for a reply that arrives at a natural point in your day, usually within an hour or two during waking time, and never at a point that suggests you've been waiting by the phone. Don't stack messages. One good reply is better than three anxious ones.

If she doesn't respond, wait a full day before you check in again, and make that second message light and standalone, not a continuation of the test. If that also goes unanswered, let it rest. Two unanswered attempts after an active exchange usually means the test was the end of her interest, not the start of a longer game. Stop there, and don't send a third message asking whether she's still interested.