What to say when he asks what you're looking for on the app

This question almost always means he's narrowing down whether to invest time talking to you. It's not hostile. He doesn't want to be texting someone for two weeks only to find out you want something completely different. Guys ask this earlier on dating apps because the stakes are low and the answer matters. If he's asking, he's already interested enough to care about the answer. Treat it as a real moment of figuring out if you're on the same page, not a trick. He's being efficient.

Tell him what you're actually looking for in one or two sentences. Be direct: casual dating, a relationship, open to whatever happens, etc. Don't hedge or use qualifiers that make it sound uncertain. Then ask what he's looking for. This does two jobs. First, it answers his question without waffling. Second, it shows you care about alignment, not just whether he's interested in you. He'll respect the straightforwardness and will usually answer the same way. This moves the conversation from screening into actual exchange.

If he asks this early in the chat, answer it quickly and naturally. Don't overthink the timing. Don't wait hours. Just slot it in when you're replying to his message. If he doesn't respond to your answer, that tells you something and you're done. Don't follow up asking why he ghosted or push for a response. He's told you what you need to know by his silence. If he does respond and says something incompatible with what you want, accept it and close the conversation. You're looking for alignment, not negotiation.