What to do when she stops texting first

First, she's lost interest but hasn't told you. Second, something in her life took over and you got deprioritized, which might be temporary. Third, she's waiting to see if you'll step up and show real effort instead of just responding to her. All three feel the same from your side, which is why the silence is so hard to read.

The pattern shift is the real signal. If she went from texting you first regularly to never doing it, that's a real change in behavior, not a coincidence. Don't explain it away. Also don't assume the worst. Just notice it happened and decide what you actually want to do about it.

A good message here does one or two things. It either gives her a real reason to respond by making it easy and specific, or it tests the temperature by proposing something in person where the dynamic is different. Don't ask how she's been or check in on her life. That puts the burden on her to engage when engagement is exactly what stopped happening.

Instead, send something that has a point. A plan. A joke about something only you two know. A question that isn't 'how are you.' The goal is to show up as someone worth her time without acting like her silence hurt you or you're desperate for her attention.

Send one solid text. Not a follow-up. Not a 'just checking in round two.' One message with something in it. Then wait three to four days. If she doesn't respond at all, you have your answer. That's the point where you stop. You've shown up, you didn't panic, and she chose not to engage.

If she does respond, the door is open again, but the burden is on her to match effort now. Don't slip back into being the one who always reaches out. If the pattern starts again where she goes silent after a few exchanges, that's information too. People show you what they want through consistency, and inconsistency is its own message.