Text him again after he said he's swamped with work

When someone says they're buried in work, take it at face value the first time. But also know that people who really like you find 30 seconds to text back, even if it's just a thumbs up emoji. The fact that he went silent after saying he's swamped tells you something important: either work actually exploded and he's offline, or he's using it as a soft exit.

You can't know which one it is from the text alone. That's why one follow-up after 3-5 days matters. It's not pushy because it's a single attempt after you gave him time. It becomes pushy if you send multiple messages or follow up again after he ignores this one.

A good follow-up treats his busyness as real, doesn't ask for much, and moves past the awkward silence. Don't reference the gap in texting. Don't ask how work is going. Just introduce a concrete plan, like coffee or drinks on a specific day, and make it easy for him to say yes or no.

The message should land like you've been busy too and you're both just getting back to normal. It shows you're not sitting around waiting and you're not resentful about the quiet period. If he's actually interested, this gives him a clear path to reconnect. If he's not, you'll know because he won't respond to this either.

Send your follow-up 3-5 days after his 'swamped' message. Any sooner feels like you didn't hear him. Any later and the moment passes. If he doesn't respond to this message within 3-4 days, stop. One non-response to a follow-up is clear enough. Two non-responses means he's checked out.

Don't send another follow-up. Don't try a different angle. Don't ask friends what they think is happening. He showed you what he thinks by not replying to a low-pressure message with an actual plan attached. Move on and talk to other people. If he comes back later, you're still available, but you don't camp out waiting.