How to respond when she says she's doing a lot of online dating right now

She has told you where she is in her life. That's useful information, and it's also a bit vulnerable to say out loud, so notice that she chose to be honest with you. Usually the sentence sits between two readings: she's keeping her options open and wants you to know it, or she's checking whether you'll flinch. Both readings call for the same thing, which is a calm reply that doesn't pretend the information isn't there. Pay attention to what comes after the disclosure. If she follows it with a question about you or a plan, she's still invested. If the rest of her messages are short and she's left the conversation hanging, the disclosure may be a polite way of cooling things down. Your reply should be a little warmer than hers, but not so warm that it reads as a rescue.

One kind of reply thanks her for being straight and then says you're happy to keep getting to know her. Its job is to acknowledge without judging. You can tell a draft is this kind because it names her honesty and points forward, and it leaves out any comment about the other people. A second kind is the light question. It asks about her, not about her dating, and it takes the conversation somewhere she gets to enjoy. The tell is that it could be sent to any woman and still work, because it's about what she likes. A third kind is the direct one. It states your own interest and how you'd like to move forward, usually with a suggestion to meet. Its job is to stop the vagueness. Leave out any comparison to her other matches, any jokes about the apps, and any hint that you're waiting for her to choose you. Each kind works best when you pick the one that matches how much you already like her.

Reply in daylight, not late at night when a reply starts to look like an emotional move. If she answers warmly, you can suggest a specific plan within the next week or two. If she replies with a short acknowledgement and nothing else, let it sit for two or three days before following up with one new thing, such as a question about something she mentioned earlier. If she still doesn't engage, stop chasing. A woman who is dating a lot will often go quiet while she sorts out who she wants to see, so silence after this kind of message usually means she's still deciding, and you should not treat it as a rejection to argue with. Set a limit for yourself: one follow-up, then move on and put your attention elsewhere.