How to reply when she says she's still deciding between two dates

Look at the tone before you look at the content. If she's laughing, using a casual lol, and bringing it up herself, she's probably enjoying the attention and wants you to stay in the game. If the message is flat and she's answering a question you asked about the weekend, she may be giving you a neutral update and nothing more. Either way, she's telling you where she stands right now, which is undecided and open. That's useful. It means you're in the running, and she's willing to say so out loud.

What she isn't telling you is who the other person is, how strong the competition is, or how she'll decide. Don't try to dig those out of her. The fastest way to lose ground is to treat her honesty as a reason to investigate. She gave you a fact. Respond to the fact, not to the mystery behind it.

When someone drops a line like this, the instinct is to fill the space with reassurance. Resist it. A short reply that sounds unbothered carries more weight than three sentences explaining why you'd be the better choice. Acknowledge what she said, keep the tone light, and point toward the plan you already have together. If you don't have a plan yet, one short line about the weekend is enough. Long replies signal that you're anxious about the outcome, and anxiety is contagious. Match her length, or come in a little shorter.

Also avoid turning her message into a debate. You don't need to argue that she should pick you, and you don't need to mention the other date. Let the decision stay with her. The easier you make it to choose you without pressure, the more likely she is to do it.

After you reply, the next few days tell you more than the reply itself. If she's really weighing the two options, she may go quiet while she decides, and that's normal. Don't read silence as rejection and don't fill it with follow-ups. One reply is enough. If she comes back warm and sets up a plan, you're in good shape. If she goes quiet for two or three days, wait another day, then send one short, low-stakes message that doesn't mention the decision at all, like a question about her week or a link to something you think she'd find funny.

If she still hasn't come back after that, stop chasing. Two unanswered messages with no plan on the table means she's either picked the other option or isn't interested enough to decide. Either way, a third message will only make it harder to recover if she comes back later. Let it sit, and move on without a sulky message on the way out.