How to get her number when she's swamped with a renovation

A line like "I'm swamped with the renovation" is information about her week, not a verdict on you. Look at what else is in the message. Does she ask you a question back? Does she mention something specific about the project, like a bathroom or a kitchen, or a contractor who's been difficult? Those details are openings. If she's sharing the mess with you, she's already letting you into her life a little, and the number can come up as a logical next step once the project is part of the conversation. If the reply is just a flat statement with nothing attached, she probably means it as a polite brush-off for now, and you should respond with lighter energy and no pressure. Pay attention to how fast she answers too. A slow, short reply is often just a busy person, but if it keeps shrinking, it's a sign to ease off.

The reply that works here is one that shows you heard the renovation, cares about how it's going, and leaves her something easy to answer. Pick up one concrete detail from what she said, like the dust, the contractors, or the deadline she's dreading, and say something real about it. Keep it short. Then let the conversation be about her project for a moment. Once she's talking about the renovation with some enthusiasm or frustration, you can shift toward the next step without it feeling abrupt. The number usually comes up most naturally when it's framed as a way to keep the conversation going while she's buried, not as a way to plan a date. Something that gives her an easy out, like being able to text you when she surfaces, works better than pinning her down to a day.

Once she's said she's busy, send your reply, then give it real space. Waiting two or three days before any follow-up is normal and reads as confident rather than distant, especially if she's dealing with contractors or a tight deadline. When you do come back, make it light and tied to what's going on in her life, like asking how the bathroom turned out or whether the floors got finished. If she answers warmly, that's your opening to ask for the number casually, for example by offering to pick the conversation back up over text when things calm down. If there's still no reply after about a week and a half, send one short, friendly message that doesn't hint at disappointment. If that also goes unanswered, stop. A busy stretch and a lack of interest look similar from the outside, and continuing to message after two unanswered attempts usually costs you more than it gains.