How to comfort someone having a bad day over text

When she says "worst day" and then refuses to go into it, she's telling you two things. The day was bad enough that she doesn't want to relive it in detail, and she's still hoping someone will care anyway. The specifics matter less than whether she's looking for company or for a plan. Look at the length and tone of the message. Short, flat, or with a lot of trailing off usually means she's tired and wants a little warmth without a conversation that takes effort. Caps, exclamation points, or a rapid stream of detail usually means she's still angry and needs to vent before she can settle.

Match her energy rather than the size of the problem. If she's barely typing, don't send a wall of text. If she's ranting, let her rant and say something that shows you're following. Notice whether she's named the person causing the problem. That's where her frustration sits, so that's where your reply should land, without you adding fuel to it.

The first kind is acknowledgement. It reflects back what she said in plain words and shows you took it seriously. It's useful when she's just dropped something heavy and hasn't asked for anything. A draft is probably this kind if it names the thing she mentioned and nothing more. It should leave out advice, reassurance that it'll all work out, and any comparison to your own experience.

The second kind is an open door. It makes clear she can keep talking if she wants, and gives her an easy exit if she doesn't. A draft of this kind usually includes a light question about how she's doing now, or an offer to listen, and it doesn't push for detail. It should leave out anything that forces her to elaborate on the bad day.

The third kind is a small shift in mood. It lightly moves the evening somewhere less heavy without dismissing what happened, such as a gentle joke about the situation or a mention of something neutral. It works only if she's already vented enough to be ready for it. A draft is this kind if it's short and it doesn't ask her to feel better right now. It should leave out sarcasm about her boss or anything that makes the bad day sound like something she's overreacting to.

If she's sent this late at night, don't wait for the morning to reply, because a slow answer can feel like you didn't care. Keep your reply short and warm, and aim to send it within the hour. There's no need to rush a full conversation, but a quick acknowledgement is better than nothing.

After that, give her room. She might not reply again, or she might come back to it the next day. If she doesn't answer, don't send a second message that re-asks how she's feeling. One light check-in the following day, something like a short question about how the day went, is enough. If she still doesn't respond, let it sit. Going quiet on her side is often just tiredness. Stop there, and don't turn the moment into a test of whether she values you.