How to ask for a second date when they're seeing other people

If they tell you they're dating others, they're not trying to let you down easy or hint that you should leave. People who want to end things just ghost or fade. Telling you directly means they respect you enough to be honest. It also means the first date went well enough that they want to keep the option open. They're just not at the point yet where they've decided to focus on one person. That point sometimes comes after the second or third date. Sometimes it doesn't. Either way, right now they're curious about you and want to see what happens next. Act like someone who believes that.

Your reply needs to do two jobs at once. First, show them you actually heard what they said and you're not threatened by it. Don't pretend they didn't mention other people. Don't make a joke out of it. Just name it calmly and move on. Then make a clear, specific ask for a second date. Coffee, dinner, a walk. Something concrete. Don't ask if they want to 'hang out sometime' or say 'let me know if you want to do this again.' That's too open-ended. Pick something real. You're showing them that you're confident enough to stick around even though they're dating others, and you're someone who knows what they want.

If they told you they're seeing other people during or right after the date, send your reply the next day when you're both sober and thinking clearly. If a few days have passed since you heard that news, send it now. Don't overthink the timing. Once it's sent, wait for their response. If they're into you, they'll say yes or suggest an alternative time. If they say they're not sure or need more time to figure things out, that's your sign to stop. Don't follow up again. If they ghost, move on. You asked. The ball is in their court. Asking twice just makes you look like you didn't accept what they said.