Respond when he's affectionate in person but goes silent between dates

When someone is warm and engaged on a date, it's easy to assume they'll be warm and engaged in texts. They're not the same thing. Some people are fully present during hangouts but terrible at initiating texts. Some find messaging stressful or pointless compared to talking in person. Some go silent with everyone between dates, not just you.

The gap between in-person and text behavior tells you something about his communication preferences, not his feelings. What matters now is whether he will adjust that preference for you. Someone who barely texts with anyone might still text you consistently if you matter enough. That's the real signal you're waiting for.

Skip messages that feel good to send and instead send ones that require a specific response. Don't ask how he's doing or send something that's optional to reply to. Give him one clear reason to text back, then watch if he does.

A good reply also doesn't ask him to change his style. You're not texting him a novel or a therapy session. You're giving him something short and concrete. If he wants to text you, a simple opening works fine. If he doesn't, at least you'll know.

Don't send anything for at least 24 hours after a date. If he reaches out first during that window, great. If he doesn't, send one reply that asks for something or confirms plans. Then wait another 24 to 48 hours. If he doesn't respond or responds hours later with one word, you have your answer about whether he prioritizes contact with you.

After one non-response or a pattern of weak replies, stop texting. If he comes back later with energy, that's when you know he was distracted or bad at texting. If he stays quiet, he's chosen his pattern. Don't keep testing.