How to reply when he matches, says hi, then disappears

When a guy matches and messages but then goes quiet for hours or days, the most common reason is that he's talking to other people and you landed in the middle of the pack. He's not ghosting permanently yet. He's just not thinking about you.

This is different from someone who never messages at all. He proved he could type words. He just chose not to send them back to you. That gap tells you he's not excited. He might come back if you text something worth replying to, but he's not sitting there waiting for your response. Don't treat the silence like a mystery to solve.

A good reply here is short, a little bit personal, and not transactional. Don't ask "how are you?" as a filler question that he feels obligated to deflect. Instead, reference something from his profile or photos that you actually want to know about, or share something light about your day that might make him laugh or think.

What matters is making it feel like you're talking to a friend, not interviewing him. He ghosted after one message, so he doesn't owe you much. But if you send something that's easy to respond to and actually shows you paid attention to who he is, you might land in his "should probably reply to this" pile instead of his "eh, maybe later" pile.

Send your reply when you feel like it. Don't overthink the timing. If he doesn't respond within three days, he's either very busy or not interested enough. Either way, sending a second message makes you look like you're waiting for him, which kills any remaining interest.

After three days of silence following your reply, stop checking his profile and stop thinking about this match. Talk to other people. If he suddenly messages back a week or two later saying he was swamped, you can decide then if you want to engage. But do not send a follow-up message or ask him where he went. That just proves the silence worked on you.